Today’s “Secret Society”
In today’s society of selfies and social media, we seem to be ever increasingly concerned about maintaining a clean social image.The problem is, no body’s perfect. Everyone’s got good AND bad. But we feel we cannot let others know about our bad side out of a fear of rejection, punishment or judgment. We try to hide our cracks to protect ourselves. We cover up our dark sides with lies, misdirection, or by maintaining unspoken secrets. But it is our own protection that leaves us vulnerable. Let me explain,
When you have secrets, fear and apprehension grow inside of you. You become worried, afraid or ashamed of the people finding out everything you try so hard to hide. This makes you feel more protective, distant, angry, guilty and ashamed of yourself. All because of your secrets.
We feel devastated when someone finds out something bad about us and it can be destructive for our lives. People finding out about your shit can destroy romances, friendships, and even careers. Think about Bill Clinton and Tiger Woods. It was only because they had a clean reputation of the “perfect and monogamous man” that they lost it all. If they were honest about who they truly were, people wouldn’t have been shocked or reacted in such a way.
Lyndon B Johnson loved pulling his dick out in public and waving it at people. He was still the 36th president of America. Jack Nicholson, Russel Brand, Hugh Heffner have reportedly slept with a combined 5,000 women and are nevertheless seen as icons. Not to mention the many sports players who also have questionable sexual habits. Basketball champion Wilt Chamberlain says he’s slept with over 20,000 women, but nobody seems to care.
Drop the bullsh*t.
When you’re honest with the world (and yourself) about who you are, nothing can harm you. No need to look good. No need to hide. If you do something bad, it’s just part of who you are. You can use it as an honest lesson to improve in the future. If you do something good, you can appreciate that about yourself and build thereon. Embracing yourself, in all honesty, makes you calmer because there’s nothing to be afraid of. It makes you more confident because you finally accept yourself for who you are. AND it allows you to gain authentic and reliable relationships with others because they’re based on who you really are.
Better yet, you become unique in your social circles. In a plastic world of fake people, you become the one person people feel is “real”.